Lately I've given some thought to prayer. What is prayer, really? It's your heart talking with God, someone said. I've tried talking to God through my mouth, through my thoughts, through my heart and though my soul, but so far, no significant effect. I could very well talk passionately about the healing power of prayer, without having ever experienced it myself. Someone once explained that my faith's the problem. I don't believe in God enough, I'm afraid of compeletely surrendering to God, I don't trust him. Probably all true, but isn't God the only one who can give faith? How can it then be MY fault, if I don't have enough faith? I have given God permission to enter my life and my heart, what else does he need? I can't believe God is so small that he can only enter a certain person's life if that person has the exact mindset needed. What's this mindset like? Open, trusting, welcoming? Stupid, blind, naive?
Don't get me wrong, I'm a firm believer of prayer. I do believe praying can bring something significant into people's lives, other people's lives. It just doesn't seem to work with me.
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